One night I had a dream of someone who cared for me We flew across the seas, they were always there for me Their presence was the thing that gave me clarity And I was at peace foe eternity I woke up and I felt so lost For something I didn’t know I longed And now I can’t go back I’ll travel far and wide To find them there again Beyond the skylines It feels like every day, I’ve walked around aimlessly I never saw the frame, thought it wasn’t made for me But I’ve opened my gaze, I get now it’s plain to see There’s something in the wake that I really need I feel like I don’t know myself I’m spinning tryna make my felt I’m building myself up I’m making my climb Cause if there’s something more I want in my sight It’s a paradigm shift, I can feel it in my head I feel it settling, like it’s drying up cement I’m modeling my life before everything is set I wanna feel alive Wanna make these memories last long I wanna be inspired by the seas I didn’t care about the way things are Because I didn’t see the way they could be, cause Imagine that Somebody who loves you Imagine that People you can come to Imagine that Settling far away (woah) I’m gonna make my escape I’m gonna make my escape I’m gonna make my escape I’m gonna get up and go I’m gonna find me a place Where I can know that I’m home And so I’m settling out Because I want to explore Until I can settle down Until I know what I’m for It all comes through at once And you're still changing Breathe in You've outdone yourself again It all comes through at once And you're still changing Breathe in You've outdone yourself again It all comes through at once And you're still changing Breathe in You've outdone yourself again It all comes through at once And you're still changing Breathe in You've outdone yourself again My momma told me speak But words are held accountable

They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom Don’t say you’re sorry I know you have no fucking shame Might be a long way (might be a long way) But I’m gon have it one damn day So I’m just gonna wait I'm just gon fucking wait And hope it picks up the pace Maybe it’ll go up in flames But I don’t really see another way I get excited when I think about it Hate my problems, but love figuring out shit Bumps in the road, but I’ll get around it End of the day, I know where the ground is I’ll be waiting, and waiting, and waiting Making an effort Even when it don’t make sense ‘Cause I’m tired of their fake pretense And the pressure and the hate I get Every time that I say my shit They like “Shame on him” Just cause I wanna control the way I live Don’t you see? You make me sick They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom Please don’t tell me shit I got all these expectations tryna weigh me in Bitch, you’d probably hate me with no matter what I did You don’t see a human, you just see me as a kid And I don’t like your model So I’m making my own Cause if it aint by my way It’s nobody’s at all You treat my life like it’s yours, I think your selfish I don’t need your supervision, don’t need help Aint no one controlling of me Aint nobody pulling my strings I used to think I had to play by the rules, I thought it was hopeless for me I aint gonna listen to what you be sayin cause you’re never open to me You say that you’re building me up, but reality is you destroy everything, yeah I can’t let it get to my head I can’t let it get to my head I can’t let it get to my head I can’t let it get to my head They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom They don’t tell me what I get to do They don’t know the half, I’m split in two Feeling down so I’ll look to the moon On the ground, I’ll just find doom and gloom

I can’t sleep, on my mind, million things 2, 5, 1 Doing this again while it’s nine to three Tiring me, yeah Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Tryna feel something Tryna feel something Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Tryna feel something, tryna Tryna find some comfort, some love, I can’t get a thing Aint nobody cares, I aint anybody’s anything I aint gonna stay, aint gon wait till the light is green I’m gon treat myself, even if that shit’s the end of me Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Can I feel something? Can I feel something? Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Can I feel something? Can I? Can’t tell if I crossed a line, ‘cause my sight’s blurred Lines blurred, I crash and I burn Poison everywhere I walk, every right turn I hurt, can’t stop ‘till I’m cured 'Till I'm cured, 'till I'm cured 'Till I'm cured, 'till I'm cured Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Tryna feel something Tryna feel something Whatever it is I want in on it I want in on it Tired of this shit Tryna feel something, tryna

Can you just tell me you hate me Cause I want you and you’ll never want me So can you tell me you hate me You don’t want to, I’m petty, I’m sorry Can you just tell me you hate me Cause I want you and you’ll never want me So can you tell me you hate me You don’t want to, I’m petty, I’m sorry And all this Zoloft got me shaky It’s just so fucking frustrating I feel neglected every day And it’s nobody to blame We worked in my head, I was goddamn wrong though Hurt someone again, I feel fucking awful Never my intent, or at least I thought so Feel so much regret, it gets hard to not loathe Every minute gotta remind myself it’s not my fault Shouldn’t pin the blame on someone, nor should I take it all I’ll think it’s in my nature but deep down that shit is false It’s so easy to say that now, but not as time goes on It’s ok, it’s fine, it’s ok, I swear Bitch I’ll be alright, I’m just not aware It’s ok, it’s fine, it’s ok, I swear Make it fucking right, as long as I’m here Can you just tell me you hate me Cause I want you and you’ll never want me So can you tell me you hate me You don’t want to, I’m petty, I’m sorry Can you just tell me you hate me Cause I want you and you’ll never want me So can you tell me you hate me You don’t want to, I’m petty, I’m sorry And all this Zoloft got me shaky It’s just so fucking frustrating I feel neglected every day And it’s nobody to blame It's not my fault, ooo Don't think about it too much I’m a fucking freak, I crawl all over you So I’m asking for closure here, not pity I thought going separate ways was overdue So why do you still wanna be friends with me? I find it odd you seem to like me now Just when I said I’d do it on my own I’d prolly fold if you lied right now Cause we both know I’m feeling vulnerable Can you just tell me you hate me? Ohh Before somebody gets hurt I keep having this nagging feeling that I've forgotten something

I endured thinking you deserved it Missed and hurt you so I misheard shit Since I’ve learned that nobody’s perfect I was sure it wasn’t on purpose I was certain that you were worth it On the surface you seemed so worth it But I’m dirt to you, I aint worth shit I just heard about all of your shit Ooo, I just heard about the shit you did Why, what in the fuck did you get from this You got the mileage out my guilt trip I hope you lie until you feel sick Ooo, I just heard about the shit you did Why, what in the fuck did you get from this You got the mileage out my guilt trip I hope you lie until you feel sick I feel so manipulated I don’t how I can take this I don’t really care how late it is Maybe it’s fine if I say it is And it started as something selfish When I harmed you I couldn’t help it You don’t buy, but you’re always sellin Damn, whose side am I even tellin? But you know it says something that I’m who’s tellin it And I think what sets us apart is what never clicked Cause you only let yourself see me as the enemy And I couldn’t get that I didn’t have the remedy Said you sorry, hope you honest Either way now, not my problem Well I hope you liked my twenty You won’ get another penny Ooo, I just heard about the shit you did Why, what in the fuck did you get from this You got the mileage out my guilt trip I hope you lie until you feel sick Ooo, I just heard about the shit you did Why, what in the fuck did you get from this You got the mileage out my guilt trip I hope you lie until you feel sick You got the mileage out my guilt trip (It's not that I hate you) I hope you lie until you feel sick (But usually it's not so hard to look someone in their eyes)

Open up new wounds Before the old ones heal You and I will pass the time Long phone calls on weekend nights And I think that we’re alike We’re both trying to get by The things we talk are taboo We’re closer than most friends You helped me with my issues I learned to trust again Cause it’s been getting to me, the shit I couldn’t show The type of shit that when you look at me you wouldn’t know I’ve always dealt with masking and shame With you I never had to save face You put it in my bag for some change Didn’t know what would happen that day And you were no one to judge me Or turn your head when I’m fucking lost I didn’t know you would cut me- I didn’t know you would cut me off (fuck) But you couldn’t even tell me why And you knew about the other time And this shit is gonna fuck my mind up Till there’s not a single person I trust But you couldn’t even tell me why And you knew about the other time And this shit is gonna fuck my mind up Till there’s not a single person I trust If you really needed time Then why’d I have to hear it through your friend? These months have proven that you lied You never wanna speak to my again You said how cathartic it is to scream I guess I understand now what you mean And when we got up to sing that piece What is it that made you sing in peace? After all we’ve been through, you made that choice I’m sorry if I ever raised my voice But I thought we’d learned to work things over And now I’m sitting here hearing our closer And you were no one to judge me Or turn your head when I’m fucking lost I didn’t know you would cut me- I didn’t know you would cut me off (fuck) But you couldn’t even tell me why And you knew about the other time And this shit is gonna fuck my mind up Till there’s not a single person I trust But you couldn’t even tell me why And you knew about the other time And this shit is gonna fuck my mind up Till there’s not a single person I trust But you- but- This aint the first time I’ve been through hell and back But at this point I don’t know how much left I have This aint the first time I’ve been through hell and back But at this point I don’t know how much left I have Take my hand Take my hand

This one’s for those who left me broken, left me bleeding Fucked me over for no reason Split me open cause it pleased them or some shit And now I’m spending every waking moment And aint resting, not for no one So that when I win you’re forced to live with it Did you even think that it was wrong? How would you feel if you blinked, and lost it all? So tell me, did you even think that it was wrong? How would you feel if you blinked, and lost it all? And that’s why You’re a piece of shit, that’s what you are to me Hypervigilant, the shit you did stays as a part of me Now I can’t live fully cause you motherfucking scarred me You gave me no chances, so bitch how could I be sorry And how dare you fucking touch something so close to me Just to use that shit in any way you weren’t supposed to be How could I have known that you would end up letting go of me? Left me falling to the floor, you threw me out, disposed of me This one’s for those who left me broken, left me bleeding Fucked me over for no reason Split me open cause it pleased them or some shit And now I’m spending every waking moment And aint resting, not for no one So that when I win you’re forced to live with it Did you even think that it was wrong? How would you feel if you blinked, and lost it all? So tell me, did you even think that it was wrong? How would you feel if you blinked, and lost it all? Just like I did I can’t run out of fuel Can hardly cope, I only do what I know how to do My tears won’t surface, bitch I can’t ever allow them to I can’t relax, that’s not what all my pain’s amounted to And I hate holding it in Break down, forget, do it all over again You took my life, I watched it blow in the wind I got three eyes, you put a hole in my head Be glad that it was always my house If I had your address, bitch, I would be there right now I’d see you where you stand and make you fucking lie down I’d make you- And now my ego’s hungry, biting more than it can chew So I bottle up and it inflates till it can’t fit the room Now my skin is thick and calloused and I’m barely getting through Validation’s the escapism I’m now indebted to Cause if I have nothing to prove Than who am I, no, who are you? So I work nights in desperation I in-fight, and always lose Stop the cycle, there’s no B sides You took months to even realize You’ll wake up tomorrow morning and you’ll continue to waste time Now I’m like a parody me Struggling and I can barely breathe Cause I been thinking bout this shit that I can’t have back And now I can’t allow myself to let it be Soon I’ll have no memory- Shut the fuck up

Breathe I can feel my youth slowly slipping away I been thinking I don’t really want that place anymore I should just pack up and go Cause every time I don’t (cause every time you don’t) I get what I deserve (you get what you deserve) Why did I fight the tears? They were my best friend I wanted Paris, but all I found was a dead end, oh And I should let it go However hard I try I never get it I try to open up, they use it as a weapon, so I guess they’ll never know King sized bed of self-doubt No, you won’t make it out I made it all for you Pain will set you free Whatever hurts is true Remember when you gave up That was you controlling all your dangers All the world's a stage The men and women merely players I defy you, stars I defy you, stars I defy you, stars I defy you, stars Why did I fight the tears? They were my best friend I wanted Paris, but all I found was a dead end, oh And I should let it go However hard I try I never get it I try to open up, they use it as a weapon, so I guess they’ll never know I defy you, stars The Eiffel tower in my mind falls to the ground The bits and pieces wash away without a sound I hardly have a choice, I’m all on my own now This is the way it has to be I will never be happy Cause I’m fully convinced it never works And believe me, I’ve tried Why did I believe you? I was so naive to I’ll be right where you left me And now my heart is empty I put everything back together But it’s bled out and dried I’m blind, you were see through Wish I didn’t need to I’ve long lost all my innocence And you know that you did that shit So it says a lot How you just don’t care at all Lately I been finding it hard to pin the blame I’m thinking that it was all a big mistake Cause I might never do anything wrong And still catch a stray Now I’ve bent up my head So it’s never again And my dreams are all dead Even if they looked me in the face I’d turn the other way Too afraid of the pain This is the way it has to be I will never be happy Cause I’m fully convinced it never works And believe me, I’ve tried Why did I believe you? I was so naive to I’ll be right where you left me And now my heart is empty I put everything back together But it’s bled out and dried I’m blind, you were see through Wish I didn’t need to

Why won't you believe me? That shit was a drunk text And I know you’ll regret it So it’s fuck this You can go and forget it And I’m upset Cause I motherfucking swear to god That you’re tryna set me up Cause it taught me I’ll be treated like shit And it taught me There are no exceptions And I fought it I did everything So be honest, that’s not what you mean It’s so hard to believe Swear that’s not what you mean I swear you’re lying to me Now I’m so scared of love Say you want me, well let it die out It’s more than bad luck Cause it’s happened every time now I’m scared to open up Scared to let my colors show Maybe I’ll act tough Can’t hue shift when I’m monochrome Tell me when did your spirit break? Tell me what made you live this way? Tell me things that you never say (take my hand) I’m dying of thirst, but the water is poisoned And I can’t take your word, no matter how well you voice it All of your concern, all it is is exploitive After what I’ve learned, I learned, yeah It taught me I’ll be treated like shit It’s exhausting There are no exceptions I didn’t just try it I did everything You’re lying Are you fucking kidding me? And you can barely croak it out Because your voice is broken down But you would rather withstand Then ever take someone’s hand I’ll never open up Never let my colors show I’m best off acting tough Can’t hue shift when I’m monochrome

Melancholic, I’m too deep in my sorrow I do it to myself but he’d make it harder Sometimes I find it hard to breathe with my eyes closed And lately I can’t even think, where’d my mind go? I don’t know where it went And I been the edge So I’ma put up my defense I been feeling so pent up That I can’t even reflect And I’ve kept up my head So long I forgot the reason It’s a reflex And now I aint got no friends I aint got shit to my name Swear I’ll never see the end I swear that it’s all the same I wish that I could pretend That I had fucking amnesia Or could feel love again In any part of my being Backstabbed, and I still feel the edge Back track, do it over again I can’t get it out of my head I can’t get it out of my head Tear ducts all dried up and abused I’m stuck, and there’s no cutting loose No luck, swear to god there’s no use Melancholic, I’m too deep in my sorrow I do it to myself but she’d make it harder Sometimes I find it hard to breathe with my eyes closed And lately I can’t even think, where’d my mind go? I don’t know where I went And I been the edge So I’ma put up my defense I been feeling so pent up That I can’t even reflect And I’ve kept up my head So long I forgot the reason It’s a refle- Knock me off my balance Bitch, I have none I can’t find my grounding I can’t stand up I’m so fucking calloused I’m so damn numb Don’t comment on that story, and don’t make that post Don’t speak to anybody, they can’t ever know My face ID can’t recognize me through the tears And I hate what I see when I look in the mirror So fucking naive To think that you are unbreakable Bitch, roll up your sleeve Because your heart is too hatable Been so fucking long Forever feels like a while now My face in a cloth I desperately try to cry out Wish I was anyone else Anyone but myself Wish I could just fucking leave But I can’t ever get help My wounds will never heal, each day I bleed out And I can’t lift my arms, I’ll never reach out Anymore

Can you hear it Can you see it Can you feel it Can you taste it I found it I finally found it I’m looking right at it It’s right there My love My sweet love I get it now You’re the one who cared I can reach that high I can tie loose ends I’ll cut my vices And make amends I can bite that bullet I can take that leap That die, I’ll roll it And I’ll be free I’m sorry I feel so damn sorry For all that I’ve put them through Them and me But as I see it I’m doing much better now More than I’ve ever been As much as I’ll ever be So this is goodbye Left with an ultimatum Leave it all behind For this beautiful new world Beautiful new world Where I can reach that high I can tie loose ends I can cut my vices And make amends I can bite that bullet I can take that leap And I’m no poet It’s not that deep But I should write something A small thing before I go To tell everyone where I’m headed So I’m writing this note Don’t be sad Just know that I’m happy now I’m going to Paris I’ll be gone for a little while Cause somebody tripped I caught them by instinct And now I start to question If I’m as bad as I think Cause maybe I’m wrong Maybe I’m dead wrong I’m not even close Not a little bit, not at all So I take that stupid note And I cast it in the lake I walk away from that cliff No, not now, not today So I still defy these stars But in a different type of way See, I defy everything they are Living to see another day I made a new friend today I finally let it in And when they asked my name I said something different The answer, here all along Way back in my head So when they asked my name Here’s what I said Paris Paris That’s my name Paris Paris In my brain

And they did me so wrong But it isn’t my fault Cause I tried to resolve They never cared at all She said I need to make it past 20 But I’m not tryna live forever And at this point I really don’t care If my stone’s unturned, I won’t be overworked to the dirt She said I need to make it past 20 But I’m not tryna live forever And at this point I really don’t care If my stone’s unturned, I won’t be overworked to the dirt I aint ever wanted bad, but there’s things that’s in my path And I’m thinking I aint yielding for the cars now And there’s been things in my past, but I think I’m over that I won’t look away, I’ll see you as you are now Like, I don’t really care, Ima fall for you regardless I been way too scared, to the point of being heartless I’ll shoot you a glare, maybe talk to you right there End of the day, I got nothing to lose I’m tryna get to you I’m traveling the whole world from my bedroom I don’t think twice because I know it’s what I’m meant to do And things don’t phase me any more then I let it do Do I want you Or do I need you Like goddamnit I think that I just want to be you You might not see me The way I see you But it don’t hurt me like it used to And she said She said I need to make it past 20 But I’m not tryna live forever And at this point I really don’t care If my stone’s unturned, I won’t be overworked to the dirt She said I need to make it past 20 But I’m not tryna live forever And at this point I really don’t care If my stone’s unturned, I won’t be overworked to the dirt And they did me so wrong But it isn’t my fault Cause I tried to resolve They never cared at all They never cared at all They never cared at all They never cared at all They never cared at- Ooooo, I’m so much more than you think I am Ooooo, I’m so much more than you think- think- think She said I need to make it past 20 But I’m not tryna live forever And at this point I really don’t care If my stone’s unturned, I won’t be overworked to the dirt To the dirt To the dirt To the dirt

In the arms of an angel But I stay on the ground Say “I aint going nowhere You just breathe in and out” I think I found my place here People do me no harm They want it to stay with me They want peace in my heart This heart of mine Been through so much But this heart of mine Still got some love to show Calluses to the edges of your hands It's been a rough few years And you made it here alive despite all of your tears Until I'm on my deathbed I'll always be here You'll always have a home I'll always be your comfort You'll always have a home You'll never be alone I'd go to hell and back for you You'll never be alone This heart of mine Been through so much But this heart of mine Still got some love to show Reach through the walls, came out the blue And you were so so tired of having nothing new And I'm sitting here in this living room with you And you smile and say "thanks" But it's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing, it's And you can find yourself In the walls of an embrace you redefine yourself And I promise, no matter what I'll keep an open door It's not a favor You don't owe me a pound We can just stay here Until the fire burns out Until you're flying Too fast for me to keep up anymore This heart of mine Been through so much Oh, this heart of mine Been through so much Oh, this heart of mine Been through so much But this heart of mine Still got some love to show Take my hand Take my hand Take my hand Don't let go